Always felt an outcast in suburbia
When Mrs. Elliott informed us what our six word memoir assignment would be, I instantly knew I wanted to write something about the impact my hometown has had on me. I know that today the idea of contempt towards a suburban lifestyle can been viewed and pretentious or a cliché, but to me, it is the idea that has shaped me more than any other force in my life.
Growing up I was a very happy child, but as I grew older I noticed that I was sometimes different than my friends and found myself interested in music and movies that my friends thought was "weird". Throughout junior high I was a generally unoriginal blob of a person who spent her weekends having stereotypical sleepovers and hanging out at Victoria Gardens. The only thing that separated me from my friends was my poetry writing, which I mostly kept to myself. “Emo” was the grand label of eight grade and I was afraid my peers would scrutinize my poems as fitting under that category.
I’d say my ultimate turning point was the summer before sophomore year. I dyed my blonde hair to chocolate brown and suddenly I became a whole new person. During 10th grade I began to realize more and more how my surroundings made me feel trapped and suffocated. The stench of fabricated happiness emitted from the boring track homes that I rode my bike past. Frankly, I began to absolutely detest Rancho with its lack of culture, art, music, things to do, and any traces of beauty. Don’t get me wrong, it’s nice to see Cucamonga peak early on a clear morning, but besides that, Rancho has little to offer in the way of splendor.
For risk of being called pretentious, I try not to let others know that I think of myself as different. I try to veer away from conventional ideas and hobbies and beliefs, which is often extremely hard to do here. A lover of nature and of meditating, it is not easy to find a near place to be at one with the earth or find someplace that is not noisy or puts me at risk of trespassing on private property. I also very much dislike that we have no music or art venues besides local coffee shop open mike nights. The Lewis Family Playhouse does put on some good shows, but as a music lover, I wish I didn’t always have to travel to L.A. to see my favorite artists.
Enough with my rant/banter, I hope this makes some kind of point. Hopefully some of you can identify with how I feel and know that feeling like an outsider in your own hometown is oh so natural for us young angsty teens.
-Katie M.
